Change of Heart

The strangest thing has happened to me. Fostering Angel and Rose and seeing what their parents are like has given me a different perspective on Dom's BM. Also there's a blog of an LDS adoptive mom who lives in Utah. Her blog has given me a change of heart. She has two adopted sons and has a great relationship w/both of the BM. I think she went through LDS family services and it is a lot different of a relationship w/the BM compared to foster-adopt. Her BM willingly gave up their babies. But then so did Dianna! Not all Foster-adopt cases are like this. Usually the court has to terminate the parents' rights. This blog is fantastic! Is the "R HOUSE" on my blog list. Go check it out if you're interested.

Since adopting Dom, I have cringed at every coming visit, hoping that his BM wouldn't show. I have just counted the minutes until we were free to go home.

That has changed. I have recently come to respect and really appreciate the decision that Dianna made to give up her parental rights willingly. We would have ended w/Dom either way, but she made it a lot easier for us to adopt him. I am forever grateful to her.

These past 2 1/2 yrs I have wanted the minimal amount of contact w/her.

From what I know about Angel and Rose's BM, I have come to have a greater appreciation towards Dianna. I just learned that Angel's BM has completely deserted her. Her grandparents are raising both grandaughters and the mom is out of the picture by her own doing.

Dianna has always wanted a relationship w/us and Dom and I've never allowed it further than the court ordered. I have felt threatened by her. She is DD and has a mind of a 12 yr old, so that makes the attachment that much stronger. I no longer feel threatened. I know I'm Dom's only Mom! He just another fun-loving aunt to spoil him.

Well this Thanksgiving I called Dianna's mom. She was so shocked to hear from me and first thought that something happened to Dom. I reassured her and asked if she and Dianna would like to see Dom before christmas. She was elated! Dianna wasn't there and she decided we would surprise her completely by just showing up! I explained that I wanted to have a more open relationship w/them and wanted them to see lots more of Dom, rather than just twice a year. She was in shock!!!

I also talked to Dianna's little brother who we haven't heard from or seen since the July 07 visit. I learned that he's in college and doing really good! He wants to be in Dom's life too and we extended that invitation.

I feel so GREAT about this! It makes me so happy to do this and let them in our lives! Dom deserves to know his other family! It just means that he gets more spoiled!

Yesterday, I got a call from Dianna's mom. She said that Dianna has to undergo a hysterectomy on 12/4. She had one of her overies removed in Jan and still had the possibility to have more children. But, now that hope is gone. Dom will be her only child, ever!

So I am so glad that I felt the need to contact their family a week earlier and they felt the need to call us about Dianna. I am going to visit her while she's in the hospital.

I just wanted to share this with my friends and family! I also would like to post a picture of his birth family. I do not cringe every time I see them anymore. This is Dom's lineage!

Dom was 2 1/2 mo. old in this picture. Dianna's grandparents made
a special trip to meet Dominic.
Top: Uncle Matt, Dianna's Grandpa (Dennis' father), Linda (Dianna's mom), Dennis (Dianna's dad)
Bottom: Dianna, Dianna's Grandma (Dennis' mom)

Dom is almost 1 yr.
Jan 07 visit (First visit since adoption)
Dennis, Matt, Dianna, Dom & Linda

July 07 visit
Dianna & me.
She's very cuddly at visits!

July o8 visit
This was at our last visit.
I actually like this picture of Dom and her. It's cute!

So now you've met Dom's birth family. They are not the most photogenic people out there, but these pictures are priceless!